Letters to the
Unterzuber.com Webmaster

The Six Newest Kittens (click on picture for larger image)

One of the great things about having a website is the mail I receive. Here are some examples. They are real and unedited (except for length and to preserve the privacy of the sender.) Believe me, I couldn't make these letters up if I tried.

*** WARNING!!***
These letters may contain extremely offensive language!!

This letter is subtle, but VERY funny (and the logic is impeccable):

celine dion is not the devil i know this as a fact as i personaly know
who the devil is as she is my mother need proof than email me back this
person has done horrific things and reveled in them as the devil does.

Someone who really believed either that I just made up the name or that I chose it at random:

came across your web site just using a google search for 'unterzuber'. my gggrandmother was an unterzuber from the hannover area of germany, so was looking for misc genealogy...found your page, and was excited, thinking maybe you're a long-lost fifth cousin forty times removed. [portion deleted]

but, i guess you only use the name unterzuber because it is so uncommon? oh well, i knew it was too good to be true! if you ever decide to switch, try spelling it 'unterzober', with that 'o'....

Regarding the Unterzuber.net website that I also operate (as a joke) and on which I pretend that I have no idea about the name:

So why are you listed as site administrator if this isn't your site? A bit confused I guess. Anyway, I take it you are an Unterzuber? E-mail me if you get a chance. Thanks

[Name deleted]

P.S. Interesting .com, but what the heck is up with the .net, seems like a waste of a domain to me.

Regarding Scout's page about John Edward being a charlatan and fraud:

You made an error saying that it is a sin to listen to a psychic, the proper word would be heed. It isn't wrong or else you would be sinning by merely being in the prescence of one spouting his nonsense, we can'tseperate ourselves fron the world as the bible teaches. We end up in situations where people commit sin all around us all the time, but merely being in the precense of it isn't a sin.

Also you are making it hazy by not saying he might by communing with demons or possessed by one as opposed to an outright fraud. It does appear as if he is receiving visual and audio information frmo demons whod obviously been hanging around the dead people while they were alive and who are being directed to this man to decieve others about the afterlife.

Here's a correspondent who doesn't care for my "What's the Deal with Rush's 'Tom Sawyer'?" page:

I really feel sorry for you. It's apparent you dropped out of school after 3 years in the sixth grade and cannot play a note of music. I bet your VCR is still flashing 12:00 after 2 years.

The style and depth of " Rush " material is way beyond your scope appreciation. Let me guess - you would rather listen to 38 Special, drink beer and listen to NASCAR races in your pickup truck with your hound dog.

Thank you for not liking Rush. It leaves an extra seat at the shows for someone with class, and who is not wearing a shirt that looks like a rebel " looooser " flag. Remember your kin folk lost that war.

Keep writing and taking up web space with pictures of snow. That snow must really make it hard to get to the out house.

I'll always be around but you're just a - Fly By Night !! At least I don't have to hide behind a dog to create dialog. I just feel sorry for the dog.!

Regarding my "Is Celine Dion Really the Devil?" page (and exactly what are "hate greets"??):


Here's a letter from a nice lady who thinks I spent too much time on the Celine page. Check out her own site to see what she considers a GOOD use of time:

This particular Celine letter is very thorough and includes several pictures submitted in support of the argument:


Ok, about all that devil thing, let me tell u that it's so silly. Celine is ana angeland her is the prove:

1. Celine's chin is this shape since she was born.

2. She doesn't do anerotic works like other singers such as: Madonna, BRITNEY SPEARS (WHICH I THINK IS THE DANCING DEVIL ITSELF), Jennifer Lopez....etc

3. She always sings for love and friendship just like she does in these songs: My heart will go on, a new day has come, that's the way it is, one heart...

4. Devil doesn't love anyone, but Celine has many special people in her life: her husband, her family, her son, her fans....

5. Look at the photos I sent u

6. She says in her ballad: "A New day has come": I see a light in the sky, oh, it's almost blinding me I CAN'T BELIEV I'VE BEEN TOUCHED BY AN ANGEL WITH LOVE...

7. Maybe her favorite colors are: Red, Black, but do not forget that white is one of her favorites TOO; just watch what she wore in "my heart will go on" video clip, and her "Au Coeur Du Stade" concert in France because she wore white clothes the entire concert.

8. Try to meet some of her fans and you'll discover that they are the most faithful people in the world: They do not watch sex movies a lot and do not enjoy Metal, Rap and Hip Hop music bands which I'm sure they are the bands of the DEVIL.

9. She sings a song called "I'm your angel"

10. If she is very woried about showing her horns, then why does she cut her hair like boys from time to another ?

11. She made two entire albums for christmas which contains songs like "The prayer" where she says ((Need to find a place, guide us with your grace to a place where we'll be safe)) SHE WAS TALKING TO JESUS. Ok? And "O holy night" where she sings: ((CHRIST IS THE LORD, OH HOLY NIGHT WHEN CHRIST WAS BORN))

12. No one of the famous entertainers takes the nickname of her husband and here are some examples: Jennifer Aniston, Shania Twain, Whitney Houston, Tina Turner...etc

13. If anyone was photo negatived, it would look like the devil itself...

14. Celine's ears are so normal and beautiful

15. She always thinks about makind an album for children

16. U can say that she's hiding behind a mask of charitys and other mony spending on pour people, but at last, what will she get... If she's the devil, then she doing what god has told the mankind to love his brother/sister

17. The devil will not give away some of his precious awards...

18. If she was the devil, then why did she let Dave Mayers make her "a new day has come video" in the sky, the kingdome of god?

Please put this prove on your site, and stop the stupid joke. IT'S NOT FUNNY AT ALL.



In April, 2005, I received this interesting e-mail. In fact, I got it on April 1, but this is not a joke. Another satisfied customer!!

very eerie this site you've provided, but not nearly as sickening as the whole realm of celine dion makes me. years ago when her career was beginning my husband, an accomplished guitarist who has played with kenny loggins, joe walsh and others, commented to me about this young girl taking off in the music business and how her voice has 'perfect pitch' and that all who heard her sing from the time she was young knew this of her voice, i did listen to her music as it caused me the kind of agony and pain you speak of on your website, i kept telling my husband that i could not get beyond the hissing, grating feeling that was wrenching my soul to even listen to what he referred to as perfect pitch,,, oprah and celine, interesting pair both self consumed and uglier than sin itself, heard the devil come out in oprah recently when she snapped at her audience as lisa presley experienced dismay with the question ' was the marriage with you and michael jackson consummated?' the whole audience was disgusted and oprah shot this wicked glance at her 'beloved' fans and said 'you know damn well you want to know' well truth is i don't watch oprah and saw this while surfing channels to find out about how a judges health is, at any rate, damn straight oprah i don't wanna care to know,,,got it? continue your study, definitely your onto something here, and yes celine looks dirty and i have always believed that her breadth smells v e r y rotten and that no matter how much money she spends on herself she still feels ugly to look at frankly the whole thing is that finally someone had the guts to put what a lot of us out here are feeling about this person but couldn't even come to terms with it in our own minds~!

And one last (fairly polite) Celine letter:

I know you don't believe all this....but still...please get a hobby...I hear kite flying is very nice this time of year.........I'm not really a "Celine fan", but I still think she's got a pretty amazing voice, and I don't believe in tearing someone to pieces when they've done absolutely nothing to me, and simply existing doesn't count. So you don't really believe it but you're just writing about it....hmm....I'll remember that when I'm writing on my theory of you being the devil....."causes great amounts of pain, misery and anguish among people......"......how does it feel? If you don't think anything of it, why open your stupid hate-filled mouth in the first place?

Someone who believes you should get a life.

This last letter is a bit puzzling. The writer suggests that I "get a hobby." I guess she missed the additional 55 web pages at my site that address other issues, interests, and activities.

By now, though, I think that you get the point.

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